


Sam's one shots Collection

by Ain_t_bovvered



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Smut, cute fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 02:52:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17051684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ain_t_bovvered/pseuds/Ain_t_bovvered
Summary: Prompts:“I heard that!” – “You were supposed to!”“Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.”





	1. Lame Moose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompts:
> 
> “I heard that!” – “You were supposed to!”
> 
> “Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.”

# Lame Moose

## Re-Post

this was another one shot for [@purpleskiesandcherrypies](https://tmblr.co/mwlhgEo2ziFS_KnjlTFsnUA)  **[2k Glorious Followers Challenge](https://theworldiscolorful.tumblr.com/post/174911441840/2k-glorious-followers-challenge) …I think?**

**Prompts:**

“I heard that!” – “You were supposed to!”

“Damn, you’re strong for a little thing.”

 **pairing :**  Sam X Reader

 **warnings:**  none

Edited by the amazing [@quillsandink-writes](https://tmblr.co/mPOzYV8468aog3RnRU6vxXQ)

You and Dean were at it again.

Both tired and bored from 3 days of research, you were just itching for some action and the only victim was poor passed-out-on-books-gently-snoring Sam.

Dean wiggled the post-it stack at you, face scrunched into a soundless laugh, you winked, grinning at him as you tapped the back of the plastic spoon on your cheek.

Nodding at the same, time you walked slowly, sneaking at the back of the giant; Dean gently started to place the insulting notes, and you focused on a much more delicate task.

Crunching down so Sam’s turned face was in front of you, you grabbed the spoon between your index finger and thumb and very carefully slid it in his open mouth.

He flinched slightly and you both froze.

When he resumed the soft snoring you relaxed and very slowly backed out the library, silently and blindly high-fiving each other and grinning like the two idiots that you were.

Later you were chilling in your bed  when you heard some heavy stomps in the hallway outside the door, quickly bending to the side you picked up one of the many researching books scattered on the floor.

“Ha-ha, guys very funny,” Sam called from the hallway, “when you have finished acting like a couple of kids, we have a rogue angel to track “

You snorted. “Lame moose,” giggling as you laid back again against the wall.

The door creaked open.

‘oh shit it was open’ you thought.

**“…I heard that.”**

A very amused smiling Sam, leaned against the door frame, arm and legs crossed. 

Trying to gather all your willpower to not laugh, you lowered your eyes, feigning focus on the book in your hands.

 **“You were supposed to.”**  you said, turning a page.

Your eyes lifted when you heard his chuckle. His head was bent shaking slightly, as he lifted his gaze, yours quickly returned to the books.

“Can you go? I’m trying to research, things”

Instead he walked to you, stopping beside the bed, looking down at you and smirking.

“What?” you said, raising your eyebrow without looking up.

“I wouldn’t call this…” he said, his arm passing before your eyes “ research” He lifted the tablet hidden by the book.

Your mouth opened and closed trying to form some kind of excuse, but a glance from him and you rolled your eyes, groaning as you fell to your side on the bed.

“Ugh, come on, Sam, it’s been three days of non-stop research, my brain is exploding, I need a pause. I need to relax!” You looked up at him, your voice sounding funny because of the squashed cheek on the mattress. “Why aren’t you pestering your brother? He started fucking around long before me.”

“Dean’s out.”

“WHAT?”  you said, sitting up fast, “That son of a bitch slipped away.” You sat back on your heels, pouting you reached to grab the book , ready to get back at work.

“What were you doing on this though?” he asked, wiggling the tablet in your face.

Your eyes widened in panic…oh…oh he couldn’t find out about that, you reached quickly but he was faster and lifted it over his head.

He smiled smugly “what were you doing?” He raised an eyebrow . You used his shoulder to prop yourself higher, in vain.

“Nothing, and this is not fair Sam, you sasquatch, gimmie that.” You made an attempt at it again, bouncing on your knees with no luck.

“Ah-ha…” he changed hands, with one he kept you distant and with the other he brought the tablet closer to read.

You whined and chewed on your lips nervously as he read.

He turned to you, a stunned smiling face watching you “is…” he squinted his eyes, smile growing wider “is this a blog? A hunter blog?”

“…no.” You avoided his eyes blushing.

“oh my god , it is!” You felt the arm stopping you relax and as he turned his face to look at the screen again, you swatted away the limb and jumped forward, snatching the tablet back, and pressing it to your chest.

He looked at you surprised for a moment before grinning and stepping forward. You backed away, but he was faster, and before you could escape the room he grabbed with his arms around your waist, lifting you up.

“Let me go!” you squeaked, legs flailing in the air as he walked back. In your panic you elbowed him in the ribs and he lost balance dragging you down the bed as he fell.

Before you could sit up, he caught you again and rolled you over, pressing you down with his weight.

“…god you’re heavy” you whined.

“Let me read it,” he puffed out as he moved his weight on his elbows.

“ Absolutely not, “ you said, blowing off the strands of his hair tickling your face.

He raised his chest a bit and you rolled to the side, curling on yourself, protecting the tablet with your body. Straddling you, he tried to pry your arms open trying to not hurting you, but your grip was as strong as your resolve to not being laughed at by the brothers.

He tried again. Finally he gave up, sitting on his heels, still straddling you as he passed a hand through his locks, messing them up.

“ **Damn, you’re strong for a little thing,”** he grunted raising his hands in the air “ok ok, if you really don’t want I will not look at it, ok?” He said sincerely .

You peaked at him from over your shoulder, still curled, protecting your reputation in your arms. You knew he would keep his word.

“Ok,” you mumbled and as you relaxed and turned on your back again, he swiftly took the tablet from your hands. “HEY! YOU PROMISED!”

He grinned, raising two crossed fingers. You scowled at him.

“Sam Winchester, I’m disappointed,” you said as he climbed out the bed, finger scrolling on the touch screen.

“hmm hmm,” he mumbled already not paying attention.

Smirking you sat up on the edge of the bed, in ne swift movement you got rid of your shirt, throwing it at him, landing on his bent arm.

“Ah nice one Y/N, but you are not fooling me, this is too juicy,” he said without raising his eyes. In a matter of seconds, a bra landed over the tablet screen.

He closed his eyes and sighed.

“You know what else is juicy, babe?” you purred.

Licking his lips, he raised his opening darkened eyes on you, drinking you in.

“I think this can wait.” He said lowly, as he let the tablet fall on a pile of books and clothes on the floor.

“…yeah I thought so “ you whispered against his lips as you dragged him down on you.


	2. Dusk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> …cute grave digging burn corpses power couple…fluff …?

##  [Dusk](https://ain-t-bovvered.tumblr.com/post/177106298595/dusk)

**RE-POST**

This was a little one shot for [@curly-haired-disaster](https://tmblr.co/mPdK8xxxZjRLOT86596P2Fw) ‘s [200 CHALLENGE](http://curly-haired-disaster.tumblr.com/post/174954972478/guess-who-is-about-to-hit-200-followers-and-yes) .

edited by the super patient [@wingedcatninja](https://tmblr.co/mTv7JEjhAO69oR643jJdaAA) 

**Characters**  : reader X (?) Winchester

**genre**  : …cute grave digging burn corpses power couple…fluff …? 

It’s my favourite part of the day.

Everything stills, every sound seems muffled like Nature itself is whispering, still there but feeble and distant. Sometimes I think that during the dusk hour, shadows are darker, blacker than during the night where the light make the stones as pale and white as the moon.

And then there is this explosion of colours, like the sky is the only thing alive and everything else is just black background and you can’t pry your eyes from it, trying to soak in every last bit of light from the dying sun at the horizon. The shadows are long and your eyes can be deceived by them, they seem to merge and mutate, like they are hiding something, and you know well what lurks in the shadows. The hair on the back of my neck is standing up and goosebumps prickle at my skin; still, my pace is calm, indulgent, almost like I’m just enjoying the walk.

Suddenly I pass right under an angel statue, I stop to gaze at it, cold stone hands covering its face in prayer or lament, its figure towering over a little headstone, with a carved flower wreath.

 I carefully avoid reading the name and date but I think my eyes caught another carving, of a teddy bear. Adjusting the grip on the shovel on my shoulder I squint my eyes to search for the tall frame against the angry purple and red sky.

There it is, just further ahead, waiting for me.

“I told you I could do this by myself”

“I know but I didn’t have anything else to do” he lied, he always had something to do. Letting out a sigh I drop the duffel bag at his feet, but his hands reach for the shovel.

“Dude, no, you know I like getting my hands dirty”

“Why can’t you just let me do this? You are so stubborn,” his tone is stern but his eyes smile and the corner of his lips twitch.

“It’ll be faster if we both dig, come on, did you find it?” I asked, dropping the issue, he knows I wouldn’t back down from a salt and burn in a graveyard at this time of day.

He pointed down at his right and I crouched down, my fingers touching lightly the barely there carved letters on the eroded stone, still warm from the summer sun absorbed.

“Yep, let’s get to work,“ I said shedding my light shirt. Never mind what time of year, I feel naked without at least one more layer, but digging up graves is never a light job, neither for the Winchesters’ big buff bodies, nor for my poor arms, back and legs.

The ground was dry and hard, and every shovel felt harder and harder, sweat trickled down my temples, I could feel drops sliding down my back, pooling at the hem of my leggings, great now I’m gonna look like I pissed myself or something.

“Take a break Y/N, I got this.”

I wanted to retort but he was right, my arms tingled and my breath was heavy. “Well, if you insist.”

Don’t smirk like that Winchester! God I need to work on my stamina more. I huffed and sat on a nearby stone, disrespecting it,but now even my legs were shaking a bit. Reaching for the cooler I grabbed one of the wet cold cans of my favourite beer, they hated that brand but I could always find it among their stuff. I smiled fondly. Joining the Winchesters has been the best decision during my worst time and I’ll never regret it.

I took a sip and hummed as the fresh bitter liquid restored life into my tired, sweaty body. Putting the can on my neck to cool down faster I looked around. Being summer, lights faded slowly and I could still see those amazing colours now just barely above the horizon, covered by trees.

This area of the graveyard was ancient, most of the stones were eroded and in ruins, just some statues survived intact, but everything was covered in nature, moss, ivy and wild flowers and it all seemed so beautiful, peaceful and natural.

Death was part of the job anyway so me being ok with the inevitable end was something I didn’t dwell on too much. My eyes roamed over the whole place, settling on the hunter shovelling and grunting in the pit we just made. The shovel stopped and next he easily hauled himself out of it. “Show off” , I thought. I always needed their help to get out and they always made sure to take advantage and get a big laugh out of it. I grabbed another can.

“Hey, babe, here, I can do the rest,“ I said tossing it to him. He caught it and tipped it to me, passing by me he patted my head and bent down for a kiss. I smiled and kissed him back. He hugged me briefly, neither of us caring about being drenched in sweat and I kissed his cheek.

“Ew you have grave dirt on your face!”

He laughed and sat down on the cooler with a groan.

“Oh woah…that was a very old-man-dad noise.“

Snorting he opened the beer can with one finger, pointing at the grave.

“Yeah yeah…”

He had already opened the casket so all I needed to do was salt the bones, sprinkle some fuel and light the fire, and I did just that, dramatically tossing the match behind me as I walked toward him.

He snorted again. “Drama queen,” he said, clinking his can to mine. Dropping dead weight on his thighs and ignoring his little grunt, I cuddled myself into his chest. His arm circled me, keeping me close, and he kissed my head gently.

“I’ll never understand how graveyards make you so cuddly and cute, you didn’t even lovingly punch me once today.”

“I don’t know.” I opened my eyes and enjoyed the silent and serene atmosphere as the fire cast a light orange filter to the whole scene. 

“It’s just…I just forget about problems for that moment and I feel at peace with myself…and also,“ I said, sneaking my hands behind his neck and nuzzling his nose with mine, “it’s creepy as fuck.”

“Aaaaand you ruined it,“ he said kissing my nose. “Is that why you always get us salt and burn cases? So you can just…stroll around in graveyards with me? And why always me, uh? Can’t you ask my brother sometimes?”

“You know the saying: couples who salt and burn corpses together, stay together.”

“….no one ever said that.”

  



	3. To live another day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> you’ve been hunting with the brothers for a couple of years and you didn’t plan on it , but the younger one just crawled inside your heart. You were ready to tell him and just get it done , not even hoping for something to change, you just needed to voice your feelings or at least the intention is there.Then again... he was distracting, too distracting and the courage you always used in hunt seemed to disappear, a blushing schoolgirl takes the wheel instead. But, in a hunter world, distraction is never a good idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDITED: When I find myself in times of trouble, @waywardbaby comes to me. Speaking words of wisdom: I got this bitch.
> 
> pairing : Sam X Reader
> 
> warnings: some bitterness, some anger but for the rest it’s just hot light smut time.
> 
> a/n: this was a request from @freudian-lacrime . Girl I hope you liked this, I mean I hope this was something resembling what you asked. Also sorry if it took all this time .

 

  


 

_“Today is the day”_ you said to yourself walking slowly down the sleeping quarters corridor, fists tight and close to your body, chewing your lips. You stopped in front of room 23 and you raised a hand to knock. Your hand hovered a few inches away from the door, still uncertain of what you were about to do. Mustering all your strength your fist made contact with the wooden surface as your breath fought in your throat. **  
**

No answer.

You knocked again, the other hand already running nervously through your hair.

“Y/N?”

You jumped, turning around quickly.

“Dean!”

“If you are looking for Sam,he is already in the kitchen” he said, tying his dead-guy’s robe and rubbing his eyes.

“Oh...okay…” You walked slowly with him as he was shuffling his dead guy’s slippers all the way to the kitchen,having a conversation with yourself in your head.

You just needed some time alone. Maybe when Dean will go on his beer run? That was running low recently. You nodded your head to no one and moved your hand in the air, praying that Dean hadn't seen any of that. Lucky for you, he was till half asleep.

Walking into the kitchen, you were greeted by the smell of delicious coffee and the sunshine that Sam’s smile brought into the room.

  


 

 He walked all the way to meet you and handed you your favourite mug, the steam coming up already giving you life, calming your nerves.

You thanked him with a tiny noise, blushing as your fingertips touched his when you took the mug and sipped quietly, sitting in the farthest corner of the table from him. He knew exactly how you liked your coffee, your resolution strengthened again by this small reminder that even the smallest details were important to him.

The first part of your plan had to be put to action.

“Dean, don’t you need to go on a beer run? We are running low” you asked raising your eyes to look at him as he was stuffing his face with eggs, a strip of bacon still half in.

“Is it?” he stopped to sip his coffee and then licked his fingers.  “Are you drinking my half, Y/N?”

“You are drinking everybody’s half” Sam chuckled setting down his own mug and turning around to look at his laptop. “But it seems that we don’t have time anyway. I found a case”.

* * *

 

Okay, maybe I could catch him while Dean’s at the bar? Or on a food run? Dammit Y/N think of something! The voice in your head is making its presence once again. You would probably go insane before you had the chance to see this whole thing through.

“Earth calls Y/N “

“W-what?”

Sam waved his big hand in front of your eyes, ripping you from your head, “You alright?”, he asked killing you with another gentle smile.

  


 

 

* * *

 

“Y-yeah “ you whispered lowering your eyes

“Come again?” he asked again, bending his enormous body so he could look in your eyes.

“ I said that I’m alright “ you repeated louder. “What did I miss?” you shook your head to clear it and focus on the job.

“Nothing much, get this, the vic…..”

Sam was speaking , you could see his mouth moving but your mind would just not focus. Your eyes were drawn to his scrunched ones, as the sun was shining in them, how his hand tried to block the light , while the other was loosening the FBI tie from around his neck. It was a hot day and you could see some beads of sweat rolling down his temples. Next, he ran a hand in his hair, messing them up deliciously and he made that face that he does when Dean would said something inappropriate.

A car’s horn blasting in the distance brought you back again.

“So we are doing this tomorrow morning. Everybody okay with it?”  
“Yeah, yeah, let’s go eat something before going back to the motel” Dean said already crossing the street.

You and Sam looked both ways, and as you started to cross the street you felt his hand coming to rest on the small of your back. You peeked at his face, turned to the other side to check for incoming cars, and he probably didn’t even notice. He was barely touching you, but you felt every inch of his hand like it was on your naked skin.

* * *

 

“You guys always look so synchronized, it’s creepy” , Dean said while sprawling in the middle of the booth, near the window. You took the opposite seat and Sam grimaced looking at the little space he would have to share with his brother. Knowing that something like that would be uncomfortable, at the very least, he decided to sit next to you.

His closeness was already nerve wrecking, and as his shoulder and thigh bumped into you, you slid further against the glass, blushing behind the opened menu in front of your face.

Dean was watching you with a smirk, scratching a sticker glued on the table.

As the waitress came to take your orders you squirmed when Sam picked the same dish you wanted, and you stuttered as you searched for another one to pick. Sam looked at you confused before grabbing the menu from your hand and handing it to the her.

“She’ll have the same as me, and ice tea, not too much ice and two straws, thank you”.

“How..?”

“You’ve been looking at that salad since we sat. Was...was I wrong?” he asked concerned.

“Ah...n-no , thanks” you said weakly before fiddling with the hem of your sleeve, missing the epic eye roll that Dean made watching you being two obvious idiots.

  


 

Once the food came you were famished and dived right in, Dean attacking his burger like his life depended on it. With the first bite your excitement died in your mouth and your chewing slowed down as you grabbed the drink, washing down the foul taste.

“Y/N?”

Sam didn’t miss your sour expression as you turned slowly to him, pouting.

“Oh, they put vinegar in it, am I right?” he asked chuckling.

You nodded and started picking at your food. They must have made a mistake in the kitchen. Before you could do anything you saw your plate being switched with Sam’s. “Here, take mine, it doesn’t have any” he said and winked at you.

“But..”

“I don’t mind vinegar”

“What?...but you always ha-ouch” Dean started to talk with his mouth full and suddenly jumped in his seat, “What’d you do that for?”

Sam didn’t answer, his mouth already full of vinegary leaves.

  


 

After some more research and witness testimonies, you finally got to relax a bit in your motel room.You were the last one to take a shower because you liked to have all the time you wanted without the boys pounding on the door for their turn.

“Guys, who’s in for pool scams and cheap drinks?” Dean asked, leaning out of the bathroom door, drying his hands on the towel, after styling his hair a bit.  

“I’m good” Sam didn’t even look up from his laptop.

Your face was aflame again as your heart started to beat faster. This is it! .

“Ah, I’m a bit tired, so it’ll be an early night for me”. You were already in your pjs and the thought of slipping into your tight pair of jeans wasn’t appealing.

“ ...lame” Dean said, grabbing his jacket.

“We have to get up at dawn, don’t stay out all night!” Sam called after him.

“Ok mom!!” you heard Dean shout back behind the already closed door.

Silence filled the room as you rocked yourself on the bed, not paying the slightest attention to the television. Your eyes kept darting back and forth from Sam’s focused face to the screen in front of you.

_Ok, Y/n, just say it._

_Like ripping off a band-aid. It can’t be that difficult!! Come on, you have nothing to lose!_

Wrong, you had everything to lose. 

Sam had always been so kind and attentive to you. What if, after your confession, he changed his behaviour?

_Do you really want to risk the friendship you'd had going on for years?_

After the fourth attempt to clear your voice and speak up, you gave up and dropped your head on your knees, letting out a long, suffering sigh.

You felt a gentle tap on your shoulder and lifted your eyes only to be met with a puppy dog stare.

“You okay?” Sam, bless his soul, was handing you a glass of water.

You blinked confused.

“Is your throat scratchy?” as his face moved a tad closer to yours.

“...what?” you asked when he pushed the glass in your hand, his hands cradling your jaw, fingers digging in your skin, probably searching for swelling.

“You kept making noises” He gently laid an hand on your forehead, “Are you coming down with something? You feel a bit hot” he said as his forehead touched yours.

Clearly you are not helping mister! .

You could smell the minty breath mingled with the motel cheap soap he used to wash his hands and the same shampoo you used.

“I-I’m fine…..” you panicked and crawled back up the bed and away from him, before looking at him suspiciously “Did you use my shampoo and conditioner again?”.

Sam sat up abruptly “...No, why would I? I have mine” He made a scene of fake coughing to cover up the slight blush that coloured his cheeks as red as yours.

“Anyway, I’m just tired, as I said….and it’s better if- if I try to sleep”

“Oh….yeah, sure. You can sit this one out if you are feeling ill, we got this.”

You were already crawling under the covers, mostly to hide, you know...like the damn coward you were.

“Yeah sure, as if.  I’m good really, good night”

“Night Y/N, I’ll wake you up, I know how you hate alarm clocks”  
“...thanks”,  _God he’s so considerate_  , you mumbled to the voice inside your head and it immediately agreed.

* * *

 

You were still swearing at yourself on the way to the forest and still doing it once inside the cavern where this Wendigo was supposed to be. You had wasted a pretty good opportunity and a new one wouldn't likely come again soon. Distracted as you were you didn’t see the shadows crawling up beside you

“Y/N DOWN!”  
Something dropped on your shoulders, throwing you to the ground with its weight, as hot flaming air passed above your head and a high pitched wendigo’s screech filled your ears.

“SAAAM?”

After the initial shock you began to feel something thick and warm trickling down your neck and you waited for the pain that never arrived. Someone lifted the weight from your back and you rolled over, catching your breath.

“SAMMY?”

Dean’s voice repeated as the creature was still burning beside you.

“I-I’m okay it’s just a scratch” You heard Sam’s pained and breathless voice.

“What the hell, Y/N? “ Dean barked in your direction “ Where was your head?”.

You flinched at his heated tone “What...what happened?” .

“What happened is that ..” Dean began as he was helping Sam to his feet, his arm around his waist “...you weren’t paying attention and almost got mauled. That’s what happened, you damn fool!!”

“Hey...Dean, it’s alright” Sam patted his brother’s chest reassuringly, a movement that made him hiss at the gush bleeding on his arm.

You paled and followed them outside, guilt clawing inside your chest cutting your breathing short.

* * *

 

Dean decided that going straight back to the bunker was the best idea. It was not that far away but the ride back had been silent and excruciatingly long. He was still pissed at you, despite his brother’s efforts to tell him that he was just fine. Sam was in pain and that cut needed to be stitched up and disinfected asap.

You just wanted to be swallowed by Baby’s leather backseat.

Once the metal door closed ,you couldn’t wait to hide in your room, which was where you were currently walking to.

“Where do you think you are goi-” Dean’s voice was covered by Sam’s heated one, but all of what they were arguing about was cut off by your door closing and the running water of the shower as you looked at yourself in the mirror. The person staring back at you wasn't yourself. What you saw was a scared, little girl, all battered up. You had to snap out of this. This had to be your wake up call!! 

Either tell him and get it out in the open, or suck it up and focus!

  


 

“You two need to sort your shit out!” Dean said pointing a finger to his brother’s direction.

“What are you talking about ?”

“Oh come on, Sammy!! You’re supposed to be the brains here” he said opening his arms in frustration, “ I mean it doesn’t take a genius to see there’s something different about Y/N in these last few weeks”.

“So you’ve noticed too?”  
“Are you kidding me? Hell yeah, I’ve noticed!!” he slammed the first aid kit on the wooden table and forced his brother to sit down after helping him to take off the blood soaked shirt. “I just didn’t say a thing before, because if she has some problems she knows she can come to us.” He started picking out the tools for stitching and disinfecting, lining them on a piece of sterile gauze . “ But this time, it affected her job and risked both hers and your life, and that’s dangerous”.

Sam grunted slightly when the alcohol touched the open wound. “Now I want to ask you...” Dean continued, eyebrows knitted in concentration as he prepared the thread and needle.  “...what do you think could possibly be going on?” He sat on the table and firmly grabbed Sam’s shoulder, keeping him still as he pushed the needle into his skin.

“I-... I don’t know honestly, she seems so shy and reserved all the time, except when she’s fighting”

“Yeah, sure. But do you think she’s behaving like that with both of us, huh? Because I can still have a full conversation with her without having to pull words out of her mouth”

Sam hissed as the needle hit a sensitive part.

“She doesn’t look that comfortable with me. Dean,have I done something that has offended her, you think?” .

Dean’s head dropped down in frustration,I’ve never seen my brother so dense, he thought. When he raised it again, his eyes focused on the stitching, “Ooooh, you big, dumb sasquatch” he said patting his back as he poured some more alcohol on the stitched wound to finish the job.

He sat up, grabbed a bandage and turned around to look at his brother in the eyes “I don’t know Sammy, big dreamy eyes, sighing randomly during the day...”, he wrapped the bandage around his shoulder, “... she was already clumsy , but that seems to have increased recently. And she has that cute….glow going on”. He looked at Sam, with raised eyebrows thinking he was being obvious, but Sam just looked at him confused.

  


 

“Damn you are being thick, man “ he chuckled , tying the bandage in the front, then he paused and loosen it a bit, grinning. “ Dude....” he started, grabbing the beer bottle resting on the table “She blushes like crazy when we are around, and trust me on this” he said pointing the bottle at his brother “ It’s not my charm that’s causing it”.

Dean took a swing of his beer as he watched the new information settling into his brother’s brain.

Sam’s forehead smoothed, eyebrows slightly lifted, the chair fell over as he suddenly scrambled up on his feet.  Dean chuckled and picked up the chair, sitting on it, legs propped up on the table.

“Ah! suck it cupid”

* * *

 

Much later found you curled on your bed, in just your baggy T-shirt used for sleep and your few possessions stuffed into the two duffel bags leaning against the wall.

As you were staring at them asking yourself if that was the right thing to do, a light knock startled you. You didn’t answer .

“Y/n?..are you asleep?” Sam knocked again.

Fucking nice!! Exactly what you didn’t need right now. You got off the bed and suddenly realized that your palms were sweaty. You rubbed them on your t-shirt in a desperate attempt to calm yourself. Clearing your voice, you opened the door.

“Hey Sam...what’s up?” you asked, trying and failing a little to sound relaxed.

“Can I come in?” He was leaning against the door frame, his right hand rubbing the back of his neck as if he too were trying to look at ease and nonchalant.

“Oh...ehm…”, pushing the duffel bags in the corner with your foot, “Yeah!! Sure!” you replied and stepped to the side as Sam entered your room.

He looked around nervously,  still scratching his head.

“How….how’s the arm?”

“The arm…?...Oh yeah, right “ he said following you as you walked in front of him, leading his eyes away from the evidence of your future plan. “It's all good, but I wanted to ask you if you could re-do the bandages. Dean was a bit sloppy on this one. We pissed him off today” he snorted.

“Yeah, sure...come sit down” You didn’t laugh back, though. There was nothing to laugh about. Dean was right, you thought as Sam removed his shirt revealing a sloppy bandage work still a bit smeared with blood. This was your fault.

Your breath hitched when you saw the damage. There would be a scar, no doubt.

“That bad?” you heard Sam’s snort as he tried to look stretching his neck to the side.

“...”  your fingers trembled before grazing his skin, skimming lightly on the angry red stiches, recognizing Dean’s expert handywork. Your vision unfocused and you felt your eyes fill with tears. You blinked quickly and tried to melt the lump forming in your throat.

“You are awfully more quiet than usu-”

“ I should leave” you blurted out, his shoulder muscles tensing under your touch as you wrapped it with a new gauze. “I mean...look what happened!! If only I hadn’t been...”

“Wait...what are you saying? .You brought your arms around him from behind so you could wrap the bandage on the front. His lips grazed your cheek as your head bent above his shoulder.

“...Nothing...I just...nothing.”

You finished and gently patted his uninjured arm. “There, all done!” You got up from the bed and walked to the door . “you should get some rest”

“No, no, no, wait a minute…” he said standing up. “It’s been weeks that you look like you want to tell me something only to just….deflect or change your mind.” 

He walked closer to where you were standing and you found yourself taking a step back. “Now you are talking about leaving?  What is it? You know you can tell me everything”. He had slouched a little, bending his huge frame so he could take a peek at your face.

You had to somehow get away from his intense stare. From those beautiful, hazel eyes that if kept looking at you, you were sure your cover would be totally blown. So you turned around and opened the door.  

“You are imagining things Sam” a quick nervous laugh escaping  your mouth “There’s nothing going on. I just work better alone” You felt tired all of a sudden. This talk, this confrontation even was something that you hadn't planned on having. Maybe you shouldn't have thought about it so much. Maybe you should have left the minute the zippers of your duffel bags had been done. Then all of this could have been avoided.

“Bullshit”

His dry tone surprised you and you turned to him, finding yourself staring at his naked chest right in front of you.

“I’ve seen you hunt. You seem completely different” Your eyes tried to look anywhere but him and, of course, failed. “You have this fire in you, and you come alive” He leveled his eyes to yours again and you backed another step. “But recently, when you are around me , you just....look like you want to be anywhere else. Exactly like now” .

You froze, hands starting to sweat once more as you looked back at him, his eyes pained. But nothing could have prepared for the question that followed

“Do… do you hate me that much?”

“What?!!” you choked on your own words, your eyes widening with a mixture of surprise and regret. You had managed to make him feel that you hated him. When, nothing was furthest from the truth.

“...I’ve made mistakes, I know that. I’m trying to atone for those. But I’ll understand if you can’t bear my sight”

You wanted to slap yourself out of the shock of those words.

Sam’s gaze felt like a stab wound. The gash on his shoulder couldn't hurt more than the pain that branded your heart like burning iron. His eyes left yours and his body slowly turned to leave but stopped short when he spotted the badly concealed duffel bags in the corner.

  


 

_shit_

“What are those?” he asked, his tone angry and sad at the same time.

No point in lying any longer. He can see right through me

“I told you...I should leave. I...I am leaving”

“Why?” he said, his jaw tensing as he set his eyes on you again.

“Because it’s the best thing for everyone” you said trying to walk past him.

Wrong move because he gripped your shoulder and shoved you back against the door, closing it with a loud thud

He just stared at you but all he wanted to say just showed in his eyes. Crossing your fingers and hoping that there was even a spec of hope, you felt the words you longed to say just...being ripped out of you. Out of your very soul.

“ ...you are everything I want and everything I’m afraid to lose…”.

Once the words were out you felt your heart stopping as his eyes closed, eyelids trembling, his lungs taking in a long breath and holding it. You both stayed silent for what felt like an eternity, your chest raising and falling, in complete contrast to his.

“Then…” he opened his hazel eyes, his gaze heated and a bit scary, piercing through you once again and exhaling slowly, almost hissing in anger, “… pray do tell me, why the fuck would you want to leave?”.

You eyebrows raised in shock. Hearing Sam swear was so rare ...and hot. You whimpered but found the courage to match his gaze.

“Because I can’t take it anymore, ok?” you hissed back taking a step forward, coming right up in his face. “I...I care for you, too much and I don’t want to..” you shook your head, lips pressed together, trying to find the perfect way to explain and coming up with nothing. So you went for the easy way and tried to step aside.

Sam wouldn’t let you, though. He grabbed your shoulders with both hands, lifted you from the ground and brought you back to stand where you were before, in front of him.

“Don’t want to WHAT?” he pressed, his voice now booming in the small room, bouncing on the walls, reverberating through your body. You stood there, right where he had placed you, like a rag doll, a puppet even, biting your inner cheek. You know what? At this point if I spilled out everything I'd have nothing to lose. The little voice in your head coaxed you.

Throwing your hands in the air you shouted back at him: “Oh come on!! You know it too well, what this life leads to. So why even bother? I’ve noticed you care about me too, maybe not like me, like me, but ...this can only end bad, either way. I’ve already got you hurt…”

“That’s not w-” he tried to cut in, but you raised your hand and shushed him.

“That’s exactly what happened!! Don’t try to soften the blow, I’m not stupid. I almost got both myself and you killed because I was too distracted with my inner monologue this morning, like a fucking rookie. I can’t be around you anymore, not like this.I’m just gonna hold my head up and get out of here. Act like I don’t give a shit…. But that’s the problem, right?” you laughed at yourself. A sad,bitter even small laugh that showed pretty much what was hidden in your soul. The uncertainty, the fear, the lack of feeling safe both for you and for all the people you loved. “...anyway...I’m going!!!”  you said, placing your palm flat on his chest and pushing against him.

He didn’t budge.

“Move”. you shouted again, pounding your fisted hands on him.

“You are not going anywhere!” he said angrily, grabbing both your hands in one of his.  He pushed his body on yours, trapping you between him and the closed door.

“Ah! But you see... You really can’t stop me. Sammy!!” You used that particular form of his name in the hope that he would get exasperated enough to let you get out.

And that seemed to press all his wrong buttons indeed but the outcome was different. His free hand grabbed your jaw firmly, but without hurting you, and forced you to look up at him.

“Don’t call me Sammy” he snarled, moving his head closer to your ear and sliding his denim covered leg between yours, blocking whatever movement you were thinking of making. “I'm not a kid. You can't tell me what to do, how to feel, what to want. And right now, I know that I don’t want you to go” he said softening his eyes.

“Well that’s not my problem, is it now?” you snapped back, but your voice still trembled under his gaze.

“You are right. It’s MY problem. Because you are running from something you don’t even know you can have”. His hand released your wrists and hit the door, right next to your head, shaking it, the same way your legs were shaking. Your heart was beating so loudly, you were afraid he could hear it. Seeing him like that, so angry, was an image so far from what Sam had always been in your head. So you tried to explain, make him see things from your point of you.

“You...you don’t understand. I can’t be satisfied with just staying at your side. But I can’t let you in, either. Because, if I do let you in, you can easily walk out, on your feet or in a puff of smoke, salt and ashes...and...I can’t … I love you and I can’t...”

He took a step back, looking at you as if he were seeing you for the first time. Your body slumped against the door, feeling empty and spent, after finally saying out loud what you were whispering to yourself for months.

“You are a coward” he whispered

You snorted at those words. He didn’t say them with hatred or disgust, but they hit you pretty hard, nonetheless.

“Yeah, tell me something I don’t know” a bitter chuckle following your remark.

“I’m a coward”

You looked at him confused.

“I told myself the exact same things. I’m not worth it, I’ve made mistakes, I can never get out, the thought of losing Dean and you….unbearable. But you know what I’ve learned in these few years? ” he said stepping closer to you again. “This life we lead is not fair. Waiting around for something mystical or the right time to happen will bring me nowhere. What use is there in you asking ‘what ifs?’... I could never give you the answers, so ... ”

He cupped your cheek with his hand, the other resting on the small of your back, drawing you closer until you were flush against his skin. Tilting your head back you found yourself staring into his eyes, the ghost of his breath on your lips.

“So..?” you asked breathless, your resolution slowly crumbling down, as your hand slid up his arms.

“Sooo..” he smirked, his thumb rubbing your cheek, “Fuck it!” and he crushed his lips to yours.

His lips were hungry and demanding as they bruised yours with that first kiss. You resented how sure of himself he was in his actions, like he knew he was already turning your legs to jello.

He was not wrong , but still…

Your hands pushed him away and  he stumbled back surprised, both breathing heavily, chests rising and falling, eyes gleaming with pent up desire. 

  


 

You took a step forward, T-shirt raised over your head and dropped at your feet. You jumped in his arms, already open to catch you, your legs wrapped around his hips, your lips covering his as they curled into a cocky smirk.

One of his hands was gripping your thigh, making sure the mark would be there for the days to come, the other, was fisted into your hair as he started walking. You thought he was moving you to the bed, but instead you felt the cold surface of the wall against your back.

“Mmm, kinky!” you murmured as Sam’s mouth sucked and kissed along your neck, your fingers buried in his hair, nails scraping. You managed to raise your hips enough to rub against him, trying to ease the pressure you already couldn’t bear.

The groan that vibrated between your breasts did nothing to alleviate your frustration.

“This...this is all sort of hot and nice “ you said breathless, as your hips repeated the movement. “But we can cuddle later”.

It was like he was waiting only for that. With a soft slap on your thighs he signaled for you to disentangle your legs from around him. Your feet were on the floor again as he knelt down in front of you and slowly, too slowly, he relieved you from your last piece of soaked fabric, kissing his way up your legs. Your fingers fisted in his hair and pulled upwards, urging him to meet your lips again. But that wasn't enough. You both licked and sucked at each other's mouths, feeding on your flaming desire while your hands struggled with his jeans. You were desperate to get rid of those.  He placed his hands on top of yours without breaking the connection provided by his kiss and he started doing the task that seemed so impossible to you. The need to feel every inch of his skin against yours was maddening and you felt feverish as the noise of belt and fabric hit the floor. His kiss faltered, as your hand closed around him, alternating between a moan and groaning your name while capturing his bottom lips between your teeth, pulling and sucking. His hands slid up your arms, cupping your cheeks before sliding down your neck to your breasts, teasing you until it was your turn to falter your rhythm, whimpering his name.

He smiled and regained control as you lost yours.

Your skin missed his as he kneeled down in front of you, fingers grazed your hips down to your knee, where his hand slid behind it and raised your leg, putting it on his shoulder. He kissed your inner thigh and your breath hitched when he laced his gaze on you, lips closing on your tender and quivering flesh.

Your hand covered your mouth, legs trembling as he lapped and sucked avidly, adding two long fingers to his torture. Your hand grabbed him by his hair, torn between pushing him against you more and pulling him away. Your mind was going crazy by how overstimulated you felt.

“S-Sam...please” you whimpered, biting the pad of your palm, trying not to scream.

His eyes opened and you looked down at him, barely noticing how dark they were through your haze.

“Say it again”

“Say...say what?” you asked breathlessly, head against the wall, eyes shut tight.

“You know what” he whispered against your skin again, his fingers curling and picking up the pace, the lewd and wet noises ringing loud in your ears.

“I….” you felt the build up pressure finally snapping, “ I love you” you cried out, your fingers digging into his healthy arm, while the other hand slammed against the wall.

He diligently stayed there to catch you collapsing on him, the leg that he propped on his shoulder numb as you slid it down. Your shaky fingers laced behind his neck, attempting to drown his body to yours. He chuckled and scooped you up, princess style, laying your spent body on the bed.

Lazy kisses were shared, light and exploring touches made as you discovered each other's. Scar by scar. Bruise by bruise.

“I’m sorry for this” you said, grazing the newest addition.

“Don’t “ he said grabbing your hand, kissin the palm of it, “ I prefer it on me than on you”.

“Well, I don’t like that. Let me have mine and I’ll let you have yours, in the end…” you said rolling him over, straddling him, “ they are signs that we survived and we lived to see another day”.

“..Morbid, but true”, Sam grabbed the back of your head and brought you down. This shared kiss felt deep and intimate and it quickly built up your desire again.

Fumbling between your bodies, you aligned yourself over him and slowly sank down, whimpering as he stretched and filled you like no one else had, ever before.

“...oh...fuck” you hissed as you paused to enjoy the feeling.

Finger digging into your hips, adding another pleasure bruise, he raised himself, chest flush against yours. He was trembling but also pacing himself, letting you adjust.

Sensing his impatience, you lifted his face to yours and kissed him deeply as you started to move, slowly at first, drawing up almost to the point, feeling every inch, just to bounce back, your back arching, every cell of your body feeling the wave of pleasure.

You repeated the motion, Sam’s forehead falling on your chest, your arms embracing him tightly. 

He guided your hips, faster and faster until your movements lost whatever plan they had. Sam grunted and flipped you over, raising your legs around him again, as he set a merciless, delicious pace that made you understand that it wouldn’t be long until-

“Y/N “ he called you, watching you with hooded eyes, his breathing quick. You raised your trembling hands,pulling his hair away from his face, waiting for him to continue. You were close, so close and he knew that, “I love you too”.

You both cried out as your orgasms drew out his or his drew out yours, who knows and, really, who cares. You held each other tight until the cool air in the room made you shiver where his body was not covering yours.

Rolling over he pulled the cover over you both and drew you closer and he sighed in your hair, contented.

“Are you still gonna leave?” he asked, a tinge of concern in his voice.

“....” you didn’t respond, but a smile pulled at your lips.

“Y/N?” you felt him tensing and already trying to look at your face, that was buried in his chest.

“I’m sorry, would anyone in their right mind ever leave after...that??”

“Y/n….” you could hear the bitch face .

You snorted, and looked up at him, pushing some strands of hair behind his ear, “I’m scared shitless, but I’ll never leave until….well, until this life claims me”.

“Don’t ...don’t say that “

“I’ll do my best “ you kissed him, “ so do your best too” , you whispered bumping your foreheads together.

“Yes ma’am”.

“Yo!!  You finished? “ Dean cocky voice ruined the moment. “Dude, I hope you didn’t pull the stitches”

“Dean fuck off “ Sam threw a boot to the closed door, as you hid under the covers, face in flames.

“Yeah yeah!! You're  welcome by the way” His laugh fainting as he walked to his room, “No more rock, paper, scissors for a month for me. Sleep well and spent”.

Sam snorted and raised the covers , finding your blushing face behind your hands.

“We’ll never hear the end of it ,won’t we?” you asked whining.

“...nope “ he laughed.

* * *

 

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